25 Oct Patient Experience: Day 30, Your Birthday Is Coming Up
Called my fathers phone Thursday evening to check in on him. My mother answered the phone and I asked her how he was doing, her response, your father is getting annoyed with me. I think he is doing fine.
She turned the phone over to my father and he begins to explain, “Hey, your mother asked me what I wanted to eat and I told her an egg. She made me some toast and I didn’t eat it. I didn’t ask for it. I know what I feel like eating and don’t, and she keeps pushing it. I know she means well, but she just needs to listen.”
I respond, “Dad it seems as if the ‘fuerte’ is back in your voice. Mom means well, but you’re right she needs to listen. At the sometime, you also need to make sure you are communicating to her too.”
My father comments, “I will. I just want to shit. I am taking Miralax, but if it doesn’t kick in soon, I need something else.”
Me, “Well dad, talk to mom and make sure she knows. If not, call me and I will take care of it.”
My father adds, “You know I am not a drinker, but for some reason I just want to crack a beer and drink it.”
I chime in, “If you feel like one, have it.”
Dad, “But I am on this medication and chemo, I am not supposed to mix both am I?”
I comment, “Dad, you aren’t planning on going out driving or operating some large farm or construction equipment are you?”
Dad, “No. I don’t feel like going anyplace.”
Me, “Then have the damn beer. It isn’t going to hurt you.”
We moved onto discussing the upcoming weekend and my father’s birthday. He made it crystal clear to both my mother and I that he was only wanting it to be something small on Sunday, with just us. He didn’t want his nieces and nephews to come up. He just didn’t feel like the fuss, the visitors, and feel like entertaining everyone. He also indicated that he doesn’t want it to be a sad birthday, but a happy one.
I believe the gift my father is wishing for most when he blows out his candles is to continue to feel better and to have a happy birthday making memories surrounded by his immediate family.
As always, I love you. Good night.
As always, you can feel free to contact me at: CANCERGEEK@GMAIL.COM
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